We need to suffer some of the cursed wrongness of life in order to find it's deep rightness. We have to feel pain we do not want to feel, carry burdens we do not want to carry, put up misery we do not want to put up with, cry tears we do not want to shed. Because ultimately, at the end of the game, when we cash in our chips, it will be all right with us only if we have been hurt with life's wrongness.